The calm after the storm

The past few weeks have been tough. I am working through some issues with my wonderful counsellor and realised a little while ago just how reliant I was on her. It freaked me out! After a lot of sleepless nights and anxiety I managed to build up the courage to tell her. She was amazing.

We have started to work through the issues and I now have a stronger understanding of what has been happening. I have never had love or kindness from my mother and now, 37 years later I am still craving it and clinging on to anyone who shows compassion and kindness to me. I felt silly when she explained it to me but now I realise that it’s something everyone needs as a child and I am not to blame for not being given it.

I hope I can move forward and learn to be a bit kinder to myself. As my counsellor says “you are not rubbish or bad… you are unskilled at the moment and you will learn to develop those skills”

I hope you all find some calm in your day today.

Mindfulness

I am trying to incorporate mindfulness into my daily life and have realised how beneficial it can be.

I’m on a quest to improve my photography skills and learn to take good night shots. I realised after I took these photos how completely focused my mind was…. On steadying the camera, on trying to get the best composition I could (which for a complete beginner takes time!!) and on reviewing, retrying and improving.

Two hours went by in a flash and my usual chaotic mind was calm and happy.

What a blessing mindfulness can be. How will you incorporate a bit of mindfulness into your life?